April 25, 2011

He said that he would attach a hotel room to the back of his bike. There would be a TV playing Ellen Degeneres reruns. And dogs...lots of dogs. He promised to find a way to pull the room while holding my hand at the same time. We would stop frequently at all of my favorite restaurants, and all the places I'd want to see. He would ride his bike all night long to the west coast. 

From there, he would begin building a bridge, ten feet at a time. Build ten, ride ten, build ten, ride ten. All the way to the island.  My island. Uninhabited, and beautiful. The ocean would be crystal. The dogs would have space to run around. There would be palm trees, lots of them. The sky wouldn't end. It would never change from blue. Except for sunsets and sunrises, which can be any color.  Rainbows too, are the exception. Every night, I would look at the stars. 

A ways from the shore would be a mansion. But not too big. Big enough that the kitchen is real nice. Of course, all stainless steel appliances. There would be a TV playing Ellen Degeneres reruns. Above the sink would be a window facing the ocean, so that it never leaves my sight.

There would be a dance studio. The fake wooden floors. Large mirrors all along one wall. The perfect sound system. All of my implements and costumes. Whenever I would want to, I would hula dance.

I'd want a small sitting room for myself in the mansion. I'd decorate it Jane-Austen style. In there, I would just think. Sit and think. Develop some new philosophy. On the fireplace would be a secret knob. Once turned, the book shelf would slide open to reveal a secret staircase. The staircase would lead me to my library. I would have every book I've ever wanted. Children's books, non-fiction, fiction, textbooks, magazines, religious books, lots of them. The library would be big. There would be a window facing the ocean, so that I could read without it leaving my sight.

Outside would be a shack. A cute, little, cheap, wooden, and tacky shack. The kind that I'd hang a hammock next to. He and I would spend lots of time out there, just sitting on the beach and playing with the dogs. At night time, he'd plug his Ipod into some speakers, and we would dance.

My garden would be beautiful. I would love to plant flowers. And tomatoes, carrots, corn, sunflowers. It wouldn't be a chore to pull weeds or water it. I would like it.

Further down the road would be my laboratory. Of course by then, I'd have my masters in neuroscience. We'd have to pay for it all somehow, right? There would be brains, lots of them. And large computers. EEG, PET, MRI machines. I'd wear a pristine, white lab coat. I'd be surrounded by interns with questions. For once my opinion, my answer, what I have to say, would be important. I'd be important. Instead of citing other people for papers or research articles, people would cite me. My name.

Of course we'd be able to get back to the mainland quickly. He would be an English teacher, so he'd have to leave every day. I'd need to go grocery shopping and run errands and go to church to thank my God and Savior for all of my blessings and do other things that ladies do. And of course I'd want to have people over. I'd have parties, and only invite the people I actually care about, and who actually care about me. And my family. I'd want to have my family over often.

He said that he will attach a hotel room to the back of his bike. He said that he will pull me all the way to my island. He said that he will be my best friend there. He said that he'll read books with me, eat my cooking, and try to not lose it all when I show him the brains. He said that he'll watch Ellen Degeneres reruns with me, and make sure that every window faces the crystal ocean. He said that he will be there for me. He promised.

And I believe every word.

Things are looking up, oh, finally. I thought I'd never see the day when you'd smile at me. We always pull through when we try. I'm always wrong...but you're never right!

Paramore- Looking Up

I'm not feeling great (I still have a lot to worry about), but a lot of things are starting to turn in my favor. 

1) I got a job! My neighbor needs a personal assistant. She said that she'd pay me $10/hr!! I'm also waiting to hear back from a little boutique that's hiring right now...I should have an interview sometime this week! Because my neighbor only needs me 5-10hrs a week, she said that I can pick my hours. That means that I could work two jobs this summer:)

2) I applied for student council today! I made an awesome application! I'm a little worried because I heard there are a lot of people going for my position, but that's okay. I still think I'll do really well.

3) THE WEDDING IS OVER. Yes. Rob and Linds are finally on their honeymoon, and there are no more plans and receptions to labor over! And though I loved having the fam here, staying in my house, distracting me from my homework, I'm really glad that they headed home.

4) Model United Nations is tomorrow! Kira is my partner again. This time, we're representing Venezuela in Historical Security Council, meaning that we get to be Venezuela in the year 1993. The topics are the situation in Rwanda and Haiti. First place again..? We'll see:)

5) Prom is coming up! Why yes, I am going with this really cute Peruvian kid. Which reminds me, he should check out this link. I am going to wear a blue dress and smile a lot:) he'll probably smell nice or rent a tux or rent a LIMO or feed me Peruvian food or all of those or something:)

All I gotta do is keep it up with the studying and reading...and then get 5's on all 6 AP tests. And then smile:)

Because I'm OCD, I usually do the write-ups for every group project. That way, I ensure that it's done the way I want it to be:).

Consumer Report Project

Because we are high school students, our group felt that it would be applicable for us to test erasers, something that we often use (especially in AP Language when we forget to write a standard five-paragraph essay). Kenzie was in charge of buying the erasers. She bought five different types: Pink Eraser, Black Pearl Papermate, Pink Pearl Papermate, Pentech, and an Artist Eraser. We decided that instead of giving each eraser a score out of ten (or something along those lines), we would rank each eraser from one to five, five being the best. That way no eraser had the same score under the same subject.

The first criterion that we judged on was the design or appearance. Considering that high school is all about looking cool and having the most stylish erasers, this was possibly the most important factor. We determined our scores based on color and overall attractiveness. 

Next, we tested out shape, or how well each eraser felt in our hands. Naturally, it couldn’t be too pointy or that might cause blisters that would get infected and kill us. We had to ensure that the eraser that got the five fit with ease and was comfy to hold for long erasing sessions.

After determining the visual and physical scores for each eraser, it was time to do the real testing! On a piece of lined paper, we drew long, dark pencil lines. After spending a few seconds rubbing the eraser against the marking, it was easy to score the next two criteria: erasing capabilities and the annoying residue stuff that is left behind so you have to brush off the paper and get it all over the floor so that the teacher gets mad at you and the janitor has to clean it up or it gets stuck all over your clothes and then ends up in your laundry and then it is not only all over your clothes but all over all of your clothes and then life sucks. The first was measured by how much of the pencil markings were erased. The latter by seeing how much residue was present.

The final criterion was price. The cheapest erasers were given the highest scores, while more expensive ones got lower scores.

Everyone in the group contributed to the project. Kenzie bought the supplies (as is mentioned earlier), I (Sarah! But after all the sarcastic comments, who else could it be?) did the write up, Emily made the poster, Jordan supervised and provided comic relief, and Kolten managed the presentation. Everyone helped with the actual testing of the erasers because we did it during class!

PS- the best ended up being the Black Pearl!! For style, the way it fits in your hand, and price...however, the artist eraser actually erased the best. The cheapy generic pink eraser did the worst. 

WOW! Happy Easter!:)


April 17, 2011

April 16, 2011

Today I learned that loneliness is when you don’t even feel comfortable with yourself.

Suffocated. Trapped. Surrounded by rules and restrictions. I have to dress a certain way. I must look a certain way. Every facet of my life must be in perfect order. I’m listlessly going through the motions and coming out empty. I have no friends. I have nothing special. I feel infinitely meaningless. Every time I try to back up and start over, I fall further down. I’m ages ahead of everyone else, yet, I wish I was five. No one cares. I’m smiling, pretty, happy; exactly what I’m supposed to be. Always fulfilling my expectations, always reinforcing my image. The hardest part is realizing that I’ve set myself up for this: I created the rules. I established the restrictions. I have turned myself into a monster, and I am terrified of myself. I am one who thrives on accomplishment, but can never get enough. One who will eventually die trying to attain unrealistic perfection.  One who keeps falling. One who can’t take care of herself, but will never give up in convincing others of the contrast. One who demands way more than is she is capable of. One who is too afraid to put aside her pride and ask for help.

April 14, 2011

I wish that I wasn't a morning person because then I could write awesome stuff at night.

Last night was the 99th anniversary of the sinking of the great ship titanic. I wish I had the energy to write something really emotional and moving about it...but I don't. Maybe later. I also want to write about my experiences with being in the pit, but I'm too drained right now :P

Please don't tell me I'm the only one who's secretly following the royal wedding?!!??!

Because yes, this jellybean really does look like Kate Middleton.

PS- In case you're wondering, no job offer yet :(

April 13, 2011

Apparently I'm not what Hallmark is looking for.

It's spring break! I've applied to get a job at 30bajillion places with nothing yet :P I'm not 17, so a lot of places (Payless Shoes) won't hire me. I had one interview (Bed, Bath, &Beyond) but the lady didn't like me because I don't want to work on sunday. There were 2 other maybes...so I'll wait and see :P

What else? I've been doing homework A LOT. I dedicated about 5 hours to it today...fantastic. And there's lots of wedding preparation going on for Lindsay as well as graduation hype for Darci.

Aaaaand that's all I have to write about.

PS- read this.