November 26, 2010



When I am a professional hula dancer, I shall have long hair
With no shoes and a lava-lava.
And I shall spend my tips on tuition and meals,
And coconut bras, and say I’ve no money for books.
I shall strut down the stage with a sway in my hips,
And I’ll spend all day on the beach,
And have a pet shark named “Fuzzy,”
And make up for the boredom of my youth.
I shall flirt with Polynesian men and get them to buy me dinner,
And (hopefully) pass all of my college classes,
And be really happy.

But now I must go to high school,
And be shy and get good grades,
And have my self esteem based on test scores and course load.
I must be what everyone else expects me to be.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now,
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am a professional hula dancer, and I have long hair.

This is a parody of Jenny Joseph's poem "Warning"

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